Sunday, September 13, 2009

I have had a busy and exciting weekend. Yesterday we went to my little niece's 5th birthday party. It was a blast. There were around 20 little kids all inside the house because it was raining buckets. The rain lasted just long enough for all the guests to go home. My kids an I stayed longer so we could enjoy some game time. We played Rockband on the Wii. It was hysterical. And then let the kids run wild while we played grown up board games. It was an awesome day. Chuck was home and I think he really enjoyed a day off. We did not make it home until around 10 o'clock and so I got the kids ready for bed. Since their little cousin was spending the night we had a huge pillow fight in the living room, Daddy even enjoyed the fun. We played for a little while, I was hoping to exhaust them so they might sleep late this morning. The plan did not work though. They were so excited to be having a sleepover that the girls woke up early to play. After bed time last night, Chuck surprised me by dancing with me in the living room. We have not done that in years. Twice last night he pulled me into a dance as the Eagles played on the ipod. It was totally unexpected to say the least. After our conversation on Friday, I get the feeling he is having second thoughts about splitting up. I let him come home (to sleep on the couch) on Friday night. Some how by Saturday morning I woke to find him snuggled next to me in bed. And again this morning I found him and Jenna snuggled in my bed with me. I am cautious about letting us slip back into a familiar routine. I think he is as well. There are so many things to work out. But it does give me hope and peace to see him making little efforts to be kind and even romantic. I am worried about our situation all the time. Not knowing what direction we will be going in the future is hard for me. But I am trying to focus mainly on the here and now. All I have is today. So I am trying spend it wisely. I am so thankful for the prayers of my friends. I can see the hand of God working. I am not trying to be ultra spiritual about all of this. I can just tell that the peace I feel is not of this world so it must be a gift from God. My goal is to just stay out of the way and let God do what ever it is He has planned.
So, today I know that not all hope is lost and that there is a spark of faith there that may be blown into a full flame if given the right conditions.
Until next time...

1 comment:

Lauren said...

Jackie,I am praying for you guys! Praying for God to make His will clear, for you to have peace that surpasses all understanding, and joy in the journey, whatever form that takes.